So today was actually a really positive day for once! I attended the doctors for the first time in like six months and took my therapist and after some back and forth with the doctor we managed to come to an agreement for me to be prescribed tramadol!
This is a big relief as sourcing it on the black market was a big pain in the ass and now I feel like I’m being treated somewhat like a human being by the NHS which is, well, a big fucking change for once. Once I have a prescription for both tramadol alongside my existing medical cannabis prescription, there will be pretty much no room for people to come at me with the classic “you’re an addict” attitude. My therapist was extremely helpful in advocating for me to be put on tramadol, so I’m gonna make sure if they proceed to go ahead and prescribe me tramadol not to fuck it up. I’m happy to ditch all my benzos to not be tempted by them and only use alcohol socially if I’m on 100-200mg a day of tramadol plus my medical cannabis.
I guess now it’s a waiting game to see whether this actually plays out into a prescription being written up, I think if it does it will take a great deal of grudge I have against the NHS and ease it just a little. Her words were literally how can we get you to see the NHS in a better way, and I said being treated like a human being and being given appropriate pain relief for the symptoms I’m fighting on a daily basis. So yeah, hopefully she goes ahead and puts at least a starter script in for me soon. I asked about the different brands of tramadol giving me different effects, her view on it was it was most likely a placebo thing. However when I went and checked in with my pharmacist on the way home about stuff, he said the brand can sometimes play a role in how it effects people, but he showed me 5 boxes of x100 tiolmed and said we have plenty of them and offered to put boxes back for me when my prescription comes through.
With that out the way, I feel it will give me some room on focusing on other things and hopefully take the strain of making sure I have enough tramadol to see me through the month on a consistent basis. I feel really grateful to my therapist for supporting me today in what I thought was turning out to be a negative and tense meeting and I wish I had her around for other health appointments because she was more supportive that any “support worker” I’ve previously had.
Now I’ve got a bit more of a lifted spirit I’m gonna try get some housework done and then sit and do some coding tonight with Marley whilst watching a film. I’m just praying in the back of my mind the doctor doesn’t come up with some reason not to engage with me on this setup that we’ve agreed to.
Peace out,
Stitch